Hello! Wow, we have been overdue for a dating/shit talking post on R+M! Quick life update: I'm now blonde so that means I am extra levels of dramatic and entitled so act accordingly, I'm joking (kind of). I went on a date this past week and honestly it was a very boring date. I only had one beer and made up an excuse to get tf out of there. I did have one positive moment though and that was when he brought up his last date he'd been on with a crazy girl. I asked him what made her crazy and that sparked the idea of today's post. There are a lot of different types of crazy you may encounter while navigating the dangerous waters of dating. I'm sure you all have dealt with someone who matches at least one of Revel + Motion's types of crazy. Enjoy!
Starting off with the most creepy type of crazy who will go to insane lengths to know your location/companions/heart rate at all times. I introduce you to the stalker. This person is always the first to view any story you post on your social media accounts, requests your location, and always is asking you where you're at and who you're with. Like a real life stalker, this person has a need to keep tabs on you 24/7. Your phone will not stop getting calls or texts until they have confirmation you're alive and giving them attention. I had a girlfriend in college who operated like this and would literally let her night be ruined if she didn't hear back from the guy she was talking to. She wanted to go to bars where she thought she would see him all night long. "He's always at ____, let's go check there." *BARF*
I remember following her around to each bar until she saw him making out with another girl which caused her to throw a drink on him. As a lover of trashy reality TV I LOVED seeing this, as a friend I was embarrassed AF by her behavior. Girl, he was clearly ignoring you all night because he isn't into you and you were acting CRAZY! The stalker will let their obsession with their prey overrun their own happiness and convince themselves they are just being "caring". My solution for warding off this particular type of crazy? Hold a mirror up to them, let them know their behavior is scaring you off. If they don't stop acting like a crazy person then block them on everything and go into witness protection.
Possibly my least favorite type of crazy because people who act this way will wear you out mentally. If you ever watched Jersey Shore both Ronnie and Sammi Sweetheart were this type of crazy, they were both fighters, which is a recipe for disaster (*insert "rahhhhn stahhhppp" meme*). The fighter is the type of crazy that has to cause an argument about anything and everything. It could be as small as forgetting to respond to a text and next thing you know it's World War III and the emotional nuclear missiles are being deployed. The fighter gets off to arguing because it's what keeps them in relationships. They love the drama and enjoy the makeup sex even more.
"Why didn't you text me when you got home last night? Why would I have to ask you to do that? YOU SHOULD KNOW TO DO THAT! STOP TREATING ME LIKE YOU DON'T CARE."
The fighter is meant to be with fellow fighters because a normal person can't take that type of mental abuse. You always have to be ready to combat their crazy with rational thinking. The thing is, everyone has been this type of crazy at least once in their life. For girls, it may be during that time of the month when you just feel like arguing and manipulating a guy into apologizing even though they did absolutely nothing wrong (lol, my speciality). Fighters will tire out if you just ghost them and they have time to reflect on their craziness. For the most part, the drama isn't worth it so avoid at all costs.
"Yeah, I'm making six figures right now and thinking about investing," says the 24 year old who just graduated from grad school and is drowning in student debt. This type of crazy will flat out lie to sound more impressive which is literally some sociopathic shit. This type of crazy will play into whatever they believe the person they're with values most. If the guy is really into sports the girl will brag about her limited sports knowledge. If the girl really likes traveling the guy will brag about his recent trip to Europe when realistically his vacations consist of being coked out in Miami.
I suggest calling this type of crazy out on their shit. Here's a real life example: I remember being at a frat party at Penn State back in 2012 with some of my high school friends. It was arts fest in the summer which is always a fun weekend up in State College. This guy had been talking to me all day long and bragging about being on the football team and he was the backup quarterback and this was his year blah, blah. I asked him if he was excited for the big SEC matchup and he said they weren't playing any SEC teams that season. At the time I was going to a SEC school and I knew PSU was 100% playing Alabama. I laughed in his face and said you're playing Bama, maybe remember that next time you lie about being on the team. He yelled, "why do you know so much about football, what the fuck?"
RECEIPTS AND STRAIGHT FACTS HUNNI. This is the best way to deal with braggers. Challenge them every step of the way until they cut the shit and start being honest. Or let them lie and just rack up that bill and then ghost them, I encourage the latter - they deserve it.
The Master Manipulator:
Confession: I have been this type of crazy many times and I have talked to this type of crazy on more than one occasion. Of all of the types of crazy, this one can be the most fun if you know how to play it. Now, I know the point of this post is to give advice on how to repel the different types of crazy. However, you can have some fun with this one if you have an admirable opponent. I was recently talking to a total scumbag who loved to think he had the upper hand at all times, little does he know I always had one up on him - LOL I know I'm crazy.
There, I just showed you one example of a master manipulator. This type of crazy treats every romantic interaction like a game and will keep score to make sure they always have the power. Remember this, manipulators will tell you EVERYTHING you want to hear and then use it against you later. Manipulators like to create an imbalance of power and will always serve their own agenda. This type of crazy is hard to repel at times and the best way to deal with them is to just not fucking talk to them.
If you find yourself with a master manipulator just get out while you can. They won't change because there's a rush to knowing how to manipulate someone into doing what you want. Ghost them, delete them, and talk to someone normal. You don't want to talk to someone who treats you like a game, you're better than that.
I hope you liked this week's post! All in all, there are a lot of different types of crazy people in the dating world. You just need to do you, respect yourself, and not let anyone treat you like shit. That's the recipe hunniiiiii. Okay, announcement: I have some exciting news, I decided I'm going to write a book! I have some rated R writing that I have done since I first moved to the city back in 2015 and have gotten really positive feedback from my girlfriends who have read it. It's basically going to be my 20s diary with some of my middle/high school diary posts thrown in there. It probably won't be down for a few years but I take time to write a little every day. I might throw up a passage on here to get some feedback from you guys at some point! That's all I have for you. Have a great Sunday, hookers!